Sometimes.....

Sometimes its the others pain, that makes you realise how susceptible you are,
Sometimes its the others tears, that make you realise how vulnerable you are,
Sometimes its the others scars, that make you remember your own wounds,
Sometimes its the others loss, that makes you value your own treasures.

Loop-song

Loop-song: A new song that you have heard recently and you love it so much that you listen to it in a 'loop', again and again.
The current loop-song for me is the Kaminey-Title song. I heard it yesterday and have not been able to listen to any other song. Everything about the song is great...no wait, not great, its awesome. The music, vocals and the best are the lyrics. You read these lyrics by the great Gulzar and just wonder how crappy are the other lyricists. This song is a refreshing change from the absolutely hopeless hindi songs and lyrics that are dished out these days. The same words pyaar-khumaar-taqraar-izahaar, payal-ghayal-pagal et. are just used over and over and over again. Kaminey title track on the other hand keeps you hooked. Its philosophical poetry. Who would have thought someone could pen a poem centred around a profane word. Kudos to Gulzar!!!Check out lyrics here.

Zeitgeist - The Movie

"Spirituality...is a particular term....which actually means.....a dealing with intuition." Thus, begins the documentary/movie(reccod by a friend) by the aforetitled name that I watched a few days ago. These few words pulls the viewer into a two hour roller coaster ride at the end of which you feel like you have been washed off the dirt of knowledge(?). The movie questions some of the conceived notions that I had about religion,9/11,world economy. (Are they even related?) The movie hits you with facts....one after another. They are so convincing that in the end, you come out with a certain uneasiness. Whom to believe and what to trust? Which incidences are real, which are manufactured and can people really do such things for their own selfish means? What is the truth? What the hell is happening to this world in which I am living in?

Its a documentary that has 3 parts. The first part deals with the origins of religion. The second with the 'real truth' behind 9/11 and the final part with who is controlling the US. Is it really the Govt.? The movie is very well presented, crisply edited. The movie has so many WTF moments that by the end you want to scream out loud . WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!

Should I believe it? I don't know. But if its true, then.......
Watch it here.

What the heck is this symbol?

I have seen countless photos of people posing with this sign. People at rock concerts show this gesture with wagging tongues and shout and scream. I always used to wonder if these guys/gals actually know what the sign means or is it only BDIW (brain-dead imitation of the west) syndrome. (By people, I refer to my countrymen out here.) I would believe it to be the latter as the tendency of sounding,looking and behaving more "americanized" than the americans, is all too evident these days in our cities. Someone told me that "Dude, thats like very cool and attitude man, its like rebel/evil/devil/style man...how do i explain, thats the latest style.....so you should do it too." I used to wonder how the heck a hand gesture could mean attitude. So, when I had seen enough of photos with wannabes with this weird hand gesture, I had to check out the facts. So, wiki to the rescue. Some interesting facts* of this symbol

1) Its called the Corna.
2) Meaning of the sign is location specific.
3) Sign of infidelity
4) Sign of cuckold
5) Italian sign for warding off bad luck (Mallochio)
6) Satan salute
7) Italian PM Silvio Berlusconi held this sign over the head of the Spanish foreign minister. Wonder what he was indicating.Hehe
8) It was Black Sabbath's Ronnie James Dio who introduced this sign in Music culture. (Incidently, Black Sabbath is Heavy Metal and not Rock...) and Dio says its 'Mallochio' and not the devil/evil sign.
9) In american sign language, it unofficially means BS. (On the other hand, if the thumb is extended, it means 'I Love you'.)

So, the next time you find people showing 'attitude' of this form, asking them if it meant that they were a cuckold could end up with a bloody nose for you. And if you want to ape this sign too, pick your meaning. Until then \/ (thats the peace sign, btw :P)

Many other tit-bits including elaborations on above can be found here.

Credit: Wikipedia

* Calling things mentioned on Wiki as a 'fact' is probably incorrect. Unless proved otherwise, will believe wiki :)

Book dwitiya

I finally finished reading High stakes, no prisoners by Charles Ferguson. This was recommended by my boss during my startup days. I managed to get hold of it at a rather cheap price (my first book bought online). Infact, shipping cost more than the book. Hehehe...guess the book ain't that popular.:P

Anyways, the book is the story of MS Frontpage (formerly Vermeer Tech.) which was started in the early 90's and sold off to MS for a very very handsome price. The book is a personal account of Charles and it describes how he came up with the idea, executed it and then sold it off. It gives an inside look into the silicon valley, the startup culture, the VC's, the funding, the faceoff with the big guys and the big dream shown to every startup employee - getting rich in a super-quick time.:)

So the initial part is devoted to the Internet in its infancy and how Bill Gates and MS didn't really understand the internet, his idea etc. Then, he talks about how the idea of the publishing tool was put into place, the funding negotiations with the VC's, and the Vermeer bidding war between MS and Netscape, and the joy of selling a startup. In the last part, he talks about the Netscape screw up, the Microsoft monopoly and his views on a variety of topics including the future of how internet would shape the 21st century. (Ya, the book was written in late nineties.)

The entire book is against the backdrop of the Netscape-MS face-off. I had the view that MS bullied Netscape into submission but the book presents another side of this story. Netscape's arrogance, their management and the decisions they took were as much to blame for their colossal failure. The book is truly an honest account and the author's opinions are either total black or total white. People/Company are intelligent or duds, awesome or stupid, evil or saints. The author doesn't mince words and is 'un-diplomatic' even with some famous people and companies. He is particularly critical of MS and Netscape. In fact, his Vermeer acquisition contract required him to keep his mouth shut w.r.t. MS for 2 years.:)

It was an interesting read and probably a book I would recommend to every startup employee :) I guess, I learned a few lessons after reading the kind of greed, backstabbing, lie-telling, cheating that goes on in the higher management with the lower rung employees absolutely clueless. Eventually, its all about "The $$$$" and all the talk about trust, ethics, goodwill is plain BS.....eh?:). I guess, some would dismissively say.."You don't need to read that book for this lesson.":)

Anyways, moving on to the next book. Guess, should be a fiction this time....

The puzzle of LIFE

I remember I used to love those "Join the dots" kind of puzzles (partly because my dot-less paintings sucked big time). So, the page had only numbers and dots and I would try to picture it without the lines and wonder..."Hmmm...this looks like a....." And I never remember getting it right. Then while joining the dots, I would again try to think ahead and predict..."Hey this looks like an Ice cream...naah seems like a bottle of poison....no wait this IS a balloon seller, or is he? well...now looks more like an undertaker..." This used to go on until the last line was drawn and the picture never used to be anywhere close to any of the guesses that I made.

These days life seems like the same kind of puzzle. Will the eventual picture be good? or will it be total crap? It should be Ok coz I am putting in so much effort....But wait, "Destiny" can screw everything. I should tell myself to stop this guessing game right away. Man, that is never going to work. I should probably learn that I have never been good at this "predicting" game. I suck at it. Moving from one point to another and thus "drawing the line", is the only wise thing I can do right now. The picture would only be revealed after the final line has been drawn, the final piece piece of the puzzle has been placed.

Come to think of it, that is a good thing. What's the point if the picture is revealed too early? The last line should be drawn with the same zeal, interest, and inquisitiveness as the first line. There's no fun if the picture's discernible too early.

The line from HIMYM that "Sometimes since you are so close to the puzzle, you just cannot see the picture being formed out there" seems apt out here. I shall keep moving on from one point to another, drawing one line after another, not making any guesses, hoping that the picture, whether complete or incomplete is a good one...One that I can be proud of, my folks can be proud of....I sure do hope so.....

Hair today, gone tomorrow

Probably a cliched title, but getting a haircut has always been a task that I simply loved to procrastinate. The reasons were diverse, absurd and stupid. Laziness, fear of watching the progress of a receding hairline are some of them. I can't recall any activity that can get boring than this. Back home, it was the fear of being kicked out from home and being disowned by my family members which compelled me to go to a barber shop. So here in the US, I was under no such pressure to go for a hair cut. Plus, the thought of spending Rs. 500 for a plain haircut acted as a deterrent too. This was equivalent to getting 20 haircuts back home!!

Thanks to video chat, my situation was beamed live back home and eventually things became way too difficult to handle. And so, yesterday was the D-day. So I went into the केश कर्तनालय and there was no Billu barber but Missej Billu barber. She directly pulled a scale and said, "This is around 4 inches long, how much do you want me cut?" Back home, my barber was a smart fella. He didnt need any such scale. There were just 3 cuts - short,medium and long. I fumbled and said 1 inch? (Bad decision...:() Snip,snip,snip and done. 5 mins all it took. I could'nt recognise myself. So the moment of truth arrived. Bill time. She said $14, I was shocked!!!! Thought to myself, that is ummm about 30 haircuts back home.......Man, it sucks. Eventually, the boring task had come to an end. Fortunately or unfortunately, wouldnt have to think about it for a long time now. I wish that science can come up with some pill that can style hair. That would sell like hot cakes....won't it? Well, atleast I would certainly buy it.

Book 1

So, finally realised that I was way off my resolution to read 10 books for the year(or was it 20? hehe...recalculating it to 10 I think would be better to reach the target :D)

Anyways, So,thanks to Mohsin, I picked up this book "The meaning of it all" which is a collection of 3 speeches by Richard Feynman. I had previously read "Surely, you're joking Mr. Feynman" which was I guess a biography of the maverick scientist. I had liked it and hence had high expectations from this one too. The book almost didn't let me down. Its truly amazing how Feynman handles sensitive issues related to Science and Religion by taking a truly objective viewpoint. His way of rationazing and treating everything from a logical point of view is worth learning. In the first lecture, he talks about the need for an "open channel" in Science, the need for expressing and maybe rewarding 'doubts', the need for an area of uncertainity to actually make any progress. The second lecture deals with the dilemma of the choice between Science and Religion. I enjoyed reading it since I could relate to it. My initial expectations were that Feynman would voice his opinion if both could co-exist together and he does start off on that. But in the later part, the topic changes to if Science can define values. So, it was a kind of let down. But, I really appreciated the balanced,objective viewpoint. The last lecture is the most unstructured and a bit impromptu i feel. It is just a collection of Feynman's thoughts on a wide variety of topics ranging from Communism to Astrology to Advertisements. Some of his prejudices, hatred are well evident esp. when he talks about the whole US-Russian, Communism-Capitalism debate. This one was interesting in bits and pieces. Overall, a weekend well spent....9 to go or is it 19? well, who cares...:)

चेहरे पर चेहरे,चेहरे पर चेहरे
राज़ छुपाये ये बहुत गहरे
कोई इन चेहरों की परतें उतारे
तो मिलेंगे चेहरे इतने सारे
ज़िन्दगी बीत जाए इन्हे गिन्ते गिन्ते
गिनती ही भूल जाएं इन्हे गिन्ते गिन्ते

कुछ चेहरों पर है झूठी मुस्कान
तो कईयों पर है आंसू बेईमान
कुछ बोलें ऐसी वाणी
ज़हर पिला दें समझाके पानी
हैवान भी इनसे कुछ अच्छे हैं
जो जुबां के तो सच्चे हैं

छल और कपट के ये सब रिसाव
झूठ और सिर्फ़ झूठ के हैं ये भाव
मन करे उन चेहरों को उतार फेकूं
मुखौटों को मैं काश जलता देखूं
रह जाए फिर बस एक ही चेहरा
जिसमे ना हो कोई राज़ गहरा..जिसमे ना हो कोई राज़ गहरा....

Memories....

I have realised that I start thinking/brooding/reminiscing when I either have nothing to do, or when I so much to do that I tell my mind, "Chuck work, wanna think/brood/reminisce and go for a walk down the memory lane?" My mind takes the easier route of taking the 'walk'. This weekend was one of those days.....There are some memories that are so deeply entrenched that they come back rushing in, just at the thought of the 'walk'.

There we were strolling down the 'lane'. Lets take the farthest lanes not the nearby ones. Not the 'first job, first day of college' ones but the farthest ones. The "20 year back" lanes, The "मैंने अपने होश भी नही संभाले थे" lanes. The lane to my surprise was all filled up. I thought the sights, sounds, smells would have long gone away. I thought the streets,if not completely empty, would be all dusty, the pictures would be hazy. But, the memories were so vividly laid out as if it were the nearby lanes. Memories of joy, sadness, laughter, pain, ecstasy, disappointments, exhilaration, depression, fear, they were all there, lined up with all their audio and visual pieces intact. The colours were not faded, the voices were not cracked, the memories were not debilitated one bit. They were infact in perfect shape. "Lets avoid the sad ones", I said. I hoped that 'time' would come and evict these unwanted hawkers from the lanes and they would fade away into oblivion one day. The others, I hoped would stay right there, forever. The memory of me being lost in a busy bazaar still had my crying voice, the chance serpent encounter still had my scream, the first day of school still had all the hues. The excitement of my first movie theatre experience, the disappointment of being thrown out of a dance and many more, all had one thing in common, they were like imprints made on wet cement.

It seems like events that evoke extreme emotions leave an indelible mark in the form of memory. These memories never fade with time. I presume everyone experiences this. Everyone must have had such experiences in their early childhood, that just stick and never go away. One can recall all those small details, the colors, the sounds, the people around....

So, the weekend was spent, pun definitely intended. The walk ended rather abruptly when someone knocked on the door. But no regrets, since I know, that I can take the walk anytime...I know, those streets would never be empty...I sure hope so.

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P.S. Credit to Parikshit for helping me pen down my thoughts. Don't Sue me for plagiarism...Please!!!:)

Biggest regret....

I came across this movie while browsing the net and the article title really started the thought train in my head. The article asks its readers to share their biggest regrets in life. Its amazing how some things give you the "Whole life went flashing before my eyes" kinda experience. What's, my biggest one regret? Well, too many of them....

I enjoyed the movie though. It is about 12 min long. So it can be watched without battling an eyelid......quite literally :)

(On the lines of "Mi Morcha nela nahi.." by Sandip Khare and Heres the original version)

मी डेटिंग केले नाही, मी सेटिंग केले नाही.
मी निरोप सुद्धा साधा कधी पाठवलेला नाही.
भवताली चॅटिंग चाले, ते विस्फारुन बघताना,
कुणी दोस्ती वाढवताना, कुणी गर्लफ्रेंड मिळवताना.
मी लॉग इन होऊन बसलो मेसेंजरवरती जेव्हा.
मज हाय करायला देखिल कुणीही पिंग केले नाही.
मी डेटिंग केले नाही..
बुजलेला यांत्रिक चेहरा, सुटलेली घाबरगुंडी.
सुंदर पोरी बघताना भर उन्हात वाजे थंडी
त्यांच्या बापाला भ्यालो अन भावालाही भ्यालो.
मी स्वप्नात सुद्धा माझ्या कधी "लफडा" केला नाही.
मी डेटिंग केले नाही
अव्यक्त फार मी आहे मूळ मुद्द जिथल्या तेथे.
कॉलेजात अभ्यास केला, कंपनीत करतो कामे.
पण बोटातुन कुठलीही एंगेजमेंटची रिंग नाही.
कुणी प्रपोज केले नाही ,कधी फ़्लर्टिंग जमले नाही.
मज जन्म नटाचा मिळता मी "हंगल" झालो असतो.
मी असतो जर का व्हिलन, तर "जीवन" झालो असतो.
मज पाहुन तरुणी कोणी हसली वा चिडली नाही.
मी "शाहिद" झालो नाही, "शक्ती" ही झालो नाही.

(I wanted to provide a link to the poet of this parody, but unfortunately, after searching for a couple of days, could not find a link. Apparently, someone by the name Abhijeet Date is the creative genius.....So, all credits of this poem go to him.)

Happiness measures.....

A few measures of happiness for a Masters student. Following are the categories(in increasing levels of happiness)

Level 0: You read a notice board and see a seminar poster that says 'free pizza and drinks' and the seminar date has not lapsed.(Wow, let me note that date/time down)
Level 1: In college, you have some spare time. So you read the notice board and bingo, a seminar offering free pizza is about to begin. (Man!! I sure am at the right time at the right place.)
Level 2: Its your cooking turn. You finish your classes for the day and on your way back, you notice that a seminar that offered free pizza has ended and guess what, there are still pizza filled boxes and cola filled bottles. (Whooopeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!....Oh God, this has to count as one of the happiest days of my lyf.)

"Oooh it gets too hot in India for me to handle......"

Some people are just weird, just too weird for me to understand. I have started hearing some comments from my fellow-Indian students at Gatech on which I just dunno how to react. Sample one of them. One of them said that he wont be going to India in Summer because its fricking hot and his body just cant withstand it. I was like what the faack!!!! He must have spent more than f*(king 20 years of his life back home and now suddenly in 1 year, his body cant withstand it? I just could not understand the reason. I can understand and appreciate reasons like saving money etc. But this one was weird. Guess, he must have already applied for citizenship here.
I may be being too judgmental(as usual) out here but its interesting to see how people's preferences change almost overnight. People suddenly find hot weather too much to handle when for most of their lives, they have spent their time in a tropical zone.

Note to self: Guess, shall hear more of such comments....asli loka dokyat jaataat...chyamaari.

Georgia-pur institute of Technology

A few demographic stats on the courses that I have taken this semester.
(No. of Indians/Total no. of students)
Software Arch. and Design:
12/26
So thats around 47%

Networked Applications and Services:
26/35
So around 75%

And here comes the shocker
Mobile Application and Services:
28/32
A Whopping 88% of the students are Indians.

Seems like I am studying in Georgia-pur Institute of Technology..

Kuch bhi ho sakta hai.....

This song has been rising up the charts on my playlist. Its been made famous by Slumdog Millionaire.

The very first time I heard that it was sung by a female named M.I.A. I had made up my mind on who was MIA. She has to be an afro-american or an afro-british because the song sounded to me like a hip hop song.(I aint very good at finding genres of song though, have to admit that) but yes, the point was the song sounded like it had been sung by someone from the afro community. A few days ago, my friend did a wiki on MIA and guess what. MIA is apparently of Sri Lankan origin and her real name is....OK here it comes - Mathangi "Maya" Arulpragasam. What the....I was totally zapped. It was akin to maybe like....A sheikh by the name "Shin Jee lee"!!! or a Kathakali expert named Joginder Singh Barnala!! Arulpragasam sounds like a female whos an expert in carnatic music, surely not hip hop/rap(she has a Grammy nomination too). Its amazing how I make up preconceived notions of so many things. I must have formed early opinions of so people,things and even thoughts! A hip hop/rap song has to be sung by an afro-american or eminem, a sheikh has to be a muslim, u surely cant have a punjabi performing Kathakali.Phew, looks like anythings possible. Need to stop categorizing/typecasting. Need to stop being so judgmental. Need to open up my mind. Need to start believing that in today's world anythings possible. Adidas tag line now seems to be more appealing. Surely looks like impossible is nothing.

Note to Self

Rules for dealing with a geek freak

Rule 1) Never try to befriend a geek freak. The only reason to approach him is if you have a technical doubt. Ofcourse, in this case be ready for some condescension.
Rule 2) Geek freaks are robots in human form.
Rule 3) You build a better camaraderie with a dog as compared to 'it'.
Rule 4) One of the easiest ways of making a fool of yourself is to expect something from a geek freak.(Actually expecting anything from anyone, apart from self is a bad idea)
Rule 5) Never ever forget the above rules.

Jaded....

Another one of those days when I did no physical activity, but feeling all tired, energy sapped, drained. Getting over physical exhaustion is pretty eazy but this kind of mental exhaustion is kinda killing me. I think the cause is the constant commotion of thoughts inside. I wish us humans had this mental switch by way of which they could simply turn off this tiring mental activity, the continuous thought factory could be shut down for maintenance for a while. Life could have been just a wee bit more smoother and easier. Guess with evolution, the switch shouldn't be too far away........Infact we hear the medical term "Brain dead". How about inducing this state artificially for a while. Shutting down should be easy I guess, its the restarting that should involve some thinking :) Till then, I shall seek refuge in Gunda :D

Amru Prof's poems.....

After my failed attempt to write poems in one of my blogs, I have decided to spare my handful of blog readers(and that includes me:P) from this agony.......for now. Hehehe..... More of my such hideous works, later.

For now, check out a few favorite poems of a prof. I especially liked TTT :)...probably because, thats the only one I understood completely. There were a few that I understood nothing.

Extended Boot up

My Laptop has an extended boot up process.....

Login -> Open FF -> gmail -> ibnlive -> cricinfo -> orkut -> blogger -> gmail -> ....
The rest of the stuff(read studies) seem to be an ISR.